. You're An EXTREME Redneck When...1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.4. You think a woman who is out of your league bowls on a different night.5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.6. Someone in your family died right after saying, 'Hey, guys, watch this.'7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.9. Your junior prom offered day care.10. You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are 'Gentlemen, start your engines.'11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.15. You need one more. She turned to me. Looked at me for a few moments, shrugged, then turned back to gazing out the windshield.I was about to rephrase the question when it dawned on me she was lost in thought.It took her a few minutes before she said anything."Did you mean it?" Did I mean what?" I asked, not knowing what she was referring to."About being with me for a lifetime. You said that, you know, back in July." Of course I did. I meant it then and I mean it now."There was an exit to Roseburg that I almost missed before deciding to turn off."Why are you turning off here?" Time for a break and a conversation. Would you like a coffee or something else? Something to eat?"She shook her head, still not looking at me. "No thanks. Coffee's fine."I found an espresso shack just off the entrance to town and pulled over in an unoccupied area near the shack. I got out, but Catherine stayed in the wagon, still lost in thought I guessed, judging by the expression on her face.I passed her the usual latté she would.
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